


Under Control

by LuciensLibrary



Category: Cormoran Strike Series - Robert Galbraith
Genre: Cormoran is a cutie, F/M, Past Rape/Non-con, Past Relationship(s), Plot What Plot, Sexual Liberation, Shameless Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-03
Updated: 2018-03-03
Packaged: 2019-03-26 08:34:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,055
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13854003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LuciensLibrary/pseuds/LuciensLibrary
Summary: So when she found herself pressed between the mattress and the large solid weight of Cormoran Strike, much heavier and bigger then Matthew, much more reminiscent of a gorilla with his thick hair and his intense face, and utterly unfamiliar... Robin was sure it was a matter of seconds before the panic arrived, before she had to force him out of her, take control, climb him and fuck him on her own terms.





	Under Control

**Author's Note:**

> I don't have a beta, english is not my native language, I probably did a terrible job trying to sound british enough. Sorry about all that, please tell me about my mistakes so I can fix them.

Robin had only even been with Matthew before. He was her first boyfriend, and he stuck around when she was at her lowest, and she was just not the type of girl to go around experimenting when there was so much (and Matthew was so much, he was half of her world!) waiting for her at home.

Since...that time, she almost always had been on top.

  
The first year, Matthew didn't care. They had taken long enough to get to sex, and he had been ridiculously understanding of the fact that she could barely touch herself yet, even non-sexually, that she couldn't think of sex without sheer panic rising up her throat like bile. Matthew had been so bloody patient with her, and then when they finally did it, when they begun to try sex again... she couldn't stand being under him, so she would turn him over, take control, ride him slowly.

  
Sometimes they did it in the shower, or with her sitting on the dinner table with him between her legs. Mostly, she was on top, and on the first year Mattew didn't care.

  
On the second year he begun to try, subtly, to take control. When Robin would tense up, he immediately give up and continue to let her rule the show as if nothing had happened. Year three he asked to be on top for his birthday, and Robin had spent the whole week fighting her nerves, had prepared herself mentally, had talked to her therapist about it and written down her worries on paper and burn the paper as a ritualistic sort of cleansing. On Matthew's birthday she thought she was ok until he begun to pound her fast, his arms framing her head on the mattress, huffing and smiling and looking down at her and she endure it, but as he lay by her side in the dark that night Robin felt like her nerves had been individually electrocuted, one by one, and she couldn't move right even to breath.

  
It didn't get easier with time, and she would come to secretly dread any special occasion when Matthew had the excuse to ask for it. But it was ok, Robin told herself, because he loved her, and she loved him, and eventually she would be able to enjoy it too. Eventually.

  
So when she found herself pressed between the mattress and the large solid weight of Cormoran Strike, much heavier and bigger then Matthew, much more reminiscent of a gorilla with his thick hair and his intense face, and utterly unfamiliar... Robin was sure it was a matter of seconds before the panic arrived, before she had to force him out of her, take control, climb him and fuck him on her own terms.

  
Yet he was kissing her so gently, so very reverently... it was all wrong for him to be kissing her like that now, it wasn't what the moment asked for at all, and the thought distracted her from the panic a little bit longer. He had been kissing her like a drowning man only a few minutes before, propping her against the door of the agency with his bare hands, and it was so trilling to be kissed like that it made her knees weak! He was big and dark and brooding and her work colleague and it was all sorts of wrong to be kissing him and Robin was loving every second of it, heat pooling on her. Anxiety, yes, and a impending sense of doom she remembered barely from her childhood days, on the edge of a trampoline in the summer pool. But something much more vicious, basic, hot... she was doing The Wrong Thing, a incredibly stupid thing, just because she couldn't stop herself.

  
Standing in the edge, indeed.

  
But now here he was, all gently, all kind... holding back. No, not holding back, savoring. It suddenly hit Robin, when he nuzzle her neck and she bit his ear, groaning, that Cormoran was pretty sure she would back off. He was giving her space to do it, not tugging at her clothes, not forcing anything beyond those molten kisses of his, even when his cock was so obvious in his pants and her breath hitched every time he would graze him thumb over her clothed nipples.

  
\- Corm... - she moaned, and she wanted to say "I'm not going to run away from you, I'm staying right here, I'm going to fuck for as long as my body can stand it", but what came out was a - ...shirt, off.

  
He backed off, sat on his own knees, begun to fumble with the buttons automatically before he dared to glance back at her, sprawled on his bed. Robin felt a thrill running her spine at the lust in his look, imagine herself through his eyes... well kissed and open, skirt hitched up enough to show the color of her knickers (blue and white, striped, not the lingerie one should use when planning on getting off... but this was the opposite of planned). She pulled her sweet pink sweater over her head in a haste, eager to show Cormoran she was serious about this, willing to go to the end.

  
He pull the shirt open, ripping the last three buttons, before diving in to kiss her again, rough chest hair sliding against her naked abdomen and making her huff in surprise. It was amazing, Robin felt like a virgin again, like all of those sensations were brand new to her... Matthew had almost nothing in the way of chest hair, and the way Cormoran was build was like a bear compared to a leopard. He engulfed her, and his mouth grew more daring with her exposure, his big hands now definitely occupying themselves with her breasts, and Robin found herself hooking her legs around him, grinding her pelvis on the bulge of his pants with little abortive moves, holding his thick hair with both hands.

  
\- Gosh, you're so fantastic Robin... - Cormoran muttered between the swell of her tits, and Robin had a suspicion he wasn't aware he had said it out loud, not at first, too distracted slipping his hands under her, grabbing her arse.

  
For a rugged, hard on the edges war veteran, Cormoran could be outrageously endearing sometimes.

  
"I might be in love with you" Robin thought, and it wasn't the first time the notion crossed her mind but it was the first time she realized it could be true, this could be real. And it wasn't the place and definitely wasn't the time to have this sort of internal debate, so she pushed him away just a little, twisted her arms between then to undo his belt, to get him away from those horrible jeans, because she needed his cock inside of her to distract her from the scarier stuff.

  
Cormoran let her pull his pants as far as she could, then hitched he skirt all the way to her waist and rub his hard, hard cock between her legs, the flimsy underwear fabric they both still wore feeling tantalizing and offensive all at once. He was big everywhere, a giant worthy of his name, and Robin was still waiting for the impulse to turn him over, to the worry that maybe she wouldn't be able to, but it still wasn't there... she was feeling everything except panic.  
Then Cormoran begun to kiss her stomach, and then lower, bringing her skirt down, and she was only in her mismatched bra and knickers now, and Corm was kissing her hip bones, as if asking for permission, looking at her with that intense face, those deep-as-a-well eyes... maybe he was panicking. Maybe he was scare brainless of what they were doing, unsure of how far he could go even now, and Robin laugh happily before she nodded because yes! God yes, of course he could!

  
Her laugh gave him pause, and then he was smiling too, and then his hot breath was over her pussy, wetting the fabric even further, and she couldn't stop a loud moan because oh! Oh, that was good! Robin didn't bother trying to unhook her brad, preferring instead to push the soft gray cotton thing up and out of her way, as she toyed with her own nipples. Cormoran stop, fingers hook on her knickers, just to look at her and groan like a man in pain.

  
\- Damn! - he muttered, then her underwear was gone, fling down her legs in a second, and she could be self-conscious from the hair there, that she was probably overdue in removing, but Cormoran didn't even bat an eye before taking her in his mouth, searing hot tongue immediately lapping between her folds and covering her clit.

  
\- Yes, oh, gosh, don't stop that... - Robin was only half aware of her words, trickling down her in short bursts of air, and then one of her hands left her breast and found a way back to his hair, her hips moving all on their own against his tongue.

  
Half a hour before, they were arguing about how Cormoran was too or not enough protective of her on their current case, and how she could handle herself, and how she wasn't ready for hand in hand combat, and a bunch of other stuff that sound a million years old already. It got personal, she got annoyed, Cormoran told her to go home and cool her head on a patronizing tone. Home was cold and empty, littered with Matthew's things still, and Robin would rather stay and fight, so she tried to do just that while Cormoran was more of less manhandle her out, and then they were shouting on each other's faces and then there was a kiss Robin was ninety percent sure she had started. She had expected him to taste like coffee, beer, bitterness and loneliness. Not like a human being, not like a man that could make her want to do things she had never done before. Yet Cormoran kept surprising her, with his layers and his deepness and his bloody mouth.

  
He was good at this. Too good, fucking her with his tongue then coming back to give attention to her clit, long hot open licks followed by pressure right there, right were it make her cry out. She was close already, too eager to stop herself... and then Cormoran had a thumb on her, spreading her wetness and his saliva, then going in, slowly...

  
\- Corm, oh, I'm...Cormoran!

  
He hold her down, let her ride her orgasm without stopping his mouth. And when she was panting, glistening with a sheer coat of sweat over her body, trying to make sense of the world again, he came up and kissed her with lips that tasted like her cum and his own taste and desperation.

  
Robin noticed he still had his boxers on, pants now only loosely hanging around his ankles, prosthetic still strapped on. So when she turned him over (and he went easily, a mere suggestion of her body and he was laying down, bringing her up with him, kisses sloppy and wet), it wasn't because she needed the control... it was because Cormoran wouldn't have it, wouldn't force himself on her at all.

  
\- Want to take this off? - she asked, still a little out of breath, gesturing to his leg. She knew it hurt him more often then not, held his movements, and sitting naked on top of him, buzzing with her orgasm still, Robin wanted nothing more then to reciprocate and make Cormoran feel as good as possible.

  
\- 'S ok? - he asked, looking at her with a hint of insecurity and yes, of course, he would be self conscious of it. Robin held his face between both of her hands, more of less pulling then to a sitting position, and kissed him intently, trying to convey how much she cared about him and how little about his disability.

  
\- Of course is ok. - she said, with a smile, when they parted, and moved herself out of the way just enough that Cormoran could unstrap the thing, and she kept kissing his neck, his shoulders, the soft point in his temple, until he was done and the prosthetics was out of the bed and it was just them. Just Cormoran looking at her, hands on her waist too soft to match the drip of precum that had stained his blue underwear, strained under his erection.

  
\- I'm not a very handsome man. - he said, as if it was a joke, as if he was asking sorry.

  
\- Corm... - she warned him, because she wasn't having any of it... no pity party when she was about to fuck all of his gigantic self into oblivion. - You underestimate yourself. - Robin smiled and kissed him quickly, then longer because his kisses were addictive, because her taste was still there. - Take this thing off.

  
She didn't wait for him to do it, just grab at the elastic of the boxers and pull down, felt Corm lifting his hips to let her do it. Then it was his cock all for her, glorious and oh! Big. Really big, and uncut, and dark... the type of cock Robin had only ever saw in porn, and not even that often because she didn't enjoy porn like Matthew would. She was diving to lick it before she could think about it straight, because it felt so inviting.

  
Cormoran felt back on the bed with a thud, hands covering his face.

  
\- Oh fuck, Robin... - he growled, actually growled. She smirked, satisfied with herself and inexplicably happy, then she open her jaw as much as she could and tried to swallow him until he was blocking her throat. - Robin! Jesus...

  
He was too big to get all the way down, and she hadn't done this in a while, but Robin took pride in always trying her best at any task and she was nothing if not earnest. So even if her eyes water and she choke a little, even if Cormoran hold her hair a little too tight in his effort to brush it of her face, she suck him down and up, then only the head, then lick all the length of his shaft, and she kept on doing it. Looking up and seeing her usually stoic boss hissing between teeth, shaking slightly with the effort to not fuck her throat down, was enough of a reward.

  
But she did want him inside of her. Oh, Robin was very keen on it!

  
\- Condom? - she asked, rough voice for all the straining activity on her mouth, coming up to kiss him again. She did kiss him hard, even as Cormoran fumble one-handed on his nightstand, the other hand running around her back.

  
\- We don't... - he muttered against her mouth, then they got distracted with kissing again, with Robin undulating her hips over his cock. - We don't have to if you don't want to. - Cormoran said in a single breath when they finally parted, as if he was pained to say it but felt like he had, for his conscience.

  
\- Does it look like I don't want to? - Robin asked, breathless, snatching the condom from his hand and tearing with practice. Condoms were a thing Robin had always insisted on, even on birthdays and special occasions, so she was an expert in putting them on and making them feel good on a sometimes reluctant boyfriend. But Cormoran cover her hand while she was sliding on him, apparently unable to stop himself for jerking on her hand, and Robin made the most of it, used her thumb on the sensitive part of his shaft, and smiled when she got a moan from him.

  
\- Jesus Christ, Robin, you're the end of me! - Cormoran hissed as she positioned herself on top of him, hands splayed on his torso for support.

  
\- Not yet... soon. - and she smiled with misshieve at her own innuendo, and it look like he was about to open his mouth to reply or argue or something, but Robin shut him efficiently by lowering herself on his cock.

  
It was just the tip, first, and it felt like too much for a second. She had to stop herself, take a deep breath. Then more, and her body stretch to accommodate Cormoran, an unbearable pressure building inside of her. She was so aware of her cunt that it wasn't impossible she could come just by getting him inside. Yet Corm's hands were holding her tights firmly, and he was shaking again, and she risked a look at his face.

  
Robin had never seen a man looking like that before. He wasn't even looking at the point they met in the middle, wasn't looking at his cock disappearing bit by bit inside of her, no... he was looking at her face.

  
"I think you love me" wasn't a very new thought, either, but at that moment Robin was fairly sure about it. As sure as she could be of anything in the chaos of her life.

  
Then he was all inside of her, all of his gloriously big cock inside of her petit frame and her clit was pressed against his body and Robin felt the urge to move. Even if still hurt a little, even if she knew he would wait her get used to him...she had to move.

  
So she did, slowly, hips doing a sort of foward eight figure, sweat dripping down her back, bra still stuck somewhere between her tits and her neck. She took a moment, never stopping her movements, to pull the rest of the fabric away from her body, and Cormoran help, trembling hands, both making little aborted sounds like they were afraid to disturb the air.

  
The angle was straining, and soon Robin lower her body, begun to kiss Cormoran again, hands pinning his shoulder as her movements became faster, more forceful. His hands were everywhere, on her face and her hair and her breasts and her ass and her tights and her belly, his hips beginning to shoot up to meet her, bouncing them on the squeaky bed.

  
It was like having sex with a mountain, all big and powerful.

  
\- Robin... - Cormoran whispered, too gone on his own pleasure to filter the tone of adoration on his voice.

  
\- Yes. - she moaned back, not sure what she was agreeing with but fine with basically everything.

  
\- I... can...? - it was the way he grabbed at her waist, Robin understood what he was asking and also understood that Cormoran was perfectly aware she might no be ok with it and why. But she was ok with it. She was confident that, this time, somehow, it would be fine.

  
She pull him lightly on the shoulder and Cormoran tipped them, and then he was on top of her, not ever pulling back. Her legs hug his waist and Robin felt how much this position was good, how it let her feel the whole weight of him on top of her, enveloping her, moving her entire body against his.

  
\- Yes. - she whispered again, and Cormoran kissed her lips with a promise of making everything all right. Then he pick up the pace, more forceful then fast, and Robin had to throw her head back and wail, a new orgasm building like lightening crackling on her flesh.

  
She could almost feel the panic she thought would come melting away in her body, becoming a nonexistent ghost in her past.

  
\- Robin... - Cormoran loved to say her name, and Robin loved to hear him say it. But she liked even better to dig both hands on his curly hair, look him in the eye and moan "Cormoran" back.

  
She came first, eyes closed, mouth open on a silent 'oh', body clenched around his cock, a vice grip on his hair. It was a long orgasm, and Robin was not entirely back from it when Cormoran pounded her once, twice, head hiding on her neck, and shook like a leaf as he spill inside of her, breath caught in his throat on the middle of saying her name again.

  
He stood on top of her, panting and utterly motionless except for the tremors in his arms and legs, for what felt like a full minute. Robin absolutely didn't mind, too wrung out to remember to untangle her legs from around him too. Then, with a grunt, Cormoran pull back carefully and threw himself by her side, closed eyes and sweaty, and the way he pull the condom out and knotted it before throwing on the floor without spilling or even looking at it made Robin realize he was fairly used to the gesture. For a split second, she felt jealous. Then she felt ridiculous for it.

  
Cormoran was not hers. She didn't even want him to be hers, like Matthew had been. She wanted him to want her, and maybe even love her, and continue to be her equal... and Robin might blame the endorphins, but she really believed all those things were possible, at that moment.

  
Cormoran open his eyes and look at her, those deep blues searching for... something. The truth, like when he was on a case.

  
\- ...so. - Robin said, voice barely recognizable. It was strange to be on the end of Strike's scrutiny.

  
\- So. - he said back, and then he turned and look at the ceiling. - That was a little hasty.

  
It was like watching a man who broke a vase trying desperately to put the pieces back together. Robin wasn't the best at discovering motives for crimes, but she was pretty good at reading people, specially people she cared about. Cormoran was afraid. Panicking.

  
And Robin was not. This time, she was not panicking, she was fine, she was more then fine... She felt great!

  
\- I wouldn't say hasty. We might had been dancing around something like this for a while now. - she said with a little smile.

  
Corm look back at her, and she felt him relax... more his mind then his body, who was a spend as hers.

  
\- ...oh, really? Tell me about it. - he asked, trying to sound nonchalant, being betrayed by a little hopeful smile on his lips.

  
\- Oh, I dunno... - Robin pretended to think. - Don't you, like, grabed my tit the first time we met?

  
\- That was so you wouldn't tumble down the stairs and crack your head. - Cormoran said with a laughter.

  
\- You brought me that green dress with that cleavage. - she her eyes crinckle around her smile. - That was just to get me to stay?

  
\- ...No, not really. - Cormoran bit his lower lip a little, smiling too shyly for his face (his beard was unbecoming of coyness, somehow). - Robin... - he begun, but she didn't let him finish.

  
She kissed his until he kissed her back, with a languid passion but unmistakable determination.

  
\- Corm. - she said when they finally parted. - I like you. I really like you. And I'm ninety percent sure you like me too. But even if you don't... - Robin trailed of, unsure of what to say next. - Even if you don't, this was still great.

  
And it was, it was fucking fantastic sex, but Robin really hoped she wasn't wrong.

  
Then she felt more then saw Cormoran take a deep breath.

  
\- ...you're not wrong, Robin. I... I do like you. Maybe more then like. Maybe even before the green dress. I'm sorry if this is messed up.

  
She couldn't stop the little smile in her face. No, Robin wasn't wrong. She wasn't hopeful over nothing... Cormoran really did love her. A bubbly feeling took her and she felt like prancing him, kissing him all over, maybe even start the whole thing again. Fuck sore kidneys and wrung out tights, they could take time and go slow and...

  
\- Well, we're both messed up, it makes sense. - she said instead, her smile impossible to hide.

  
Something lit in his face, something wary but hopeful.

  
\- You really want to try this? - he asked, big hand rubbing circles on her tight.

  
\- Yeah Corm. I really do. - Robin bumped his nose with her finger, knowing full well she became childlike and silly when she was in love and not caring one darn bit. - So, you gonna snog me or what?

  
Cormoran didn't have to be told twice.


End file.
